I am not really a ‘dates’ person, if that is even a thing. Honestly, I would rather stay home and watch a movie, or read a book, or listen to music, or just sleep. In fact, I would just sleep. Sleep comes to me so effortlessly I sometimes think it is a disease.
Ideal place: Deserted clean beach with massive waves and white sand, preferably during sunset, so I could watch the orange of the sun gently touching lips with the deep blue of the ocean. I am scared of deep waters, big reason I have never imagined myself on those ships that take months before they finally dock. I am scared of the grave silence that lies beneath the waters, and even more scared of drowning. But again, I enjoy the thrill that comes with all those thoughts, and what other way to enjoy the serenity than sitting along the beach watching it all from a safe distance?
I love the feel of fine sand against my soles. I don’t think I have ever worn any kid of shoes on the beach, not even sandals. I love when the sand gently clutches onto my skin, like a baby clinging on to its mother for safety. It gives me a touch of responsibility, of freedom, of a chance to let go of all that is troubling me.
I am not a screamer. Not at all. Maybe because I spent four years in a high school where shouting was criminal. Yes, you could be suspended for two weeks just because you shouted. And I have since grown with the fear of shouting. But the beach has its own way of calming my shouting fears, so I mostly scream my lungs out on the beach, and the breeze has a beautiful way of drowning my screams before they even get to someone else’s ears.
So, I would love to go on a date along the beach, hotel or not. If I will not be alone, I would love to hold hands with whoever it will be, and squeeze them too much whenever I feel like.
Ideal person: I am allowed to go alone, no? But in case I am not alone, I would love to go on a date with someone who understands me too well, even better if they know me better than myself. Of course, my boyfriend tops that list, because he knows me too much. Because he is my all-time person, my to-go-to person. Because he understands when I say I am sad and I am not willing to talk about it, and he also understands when I need some time alone. And he understands when all I want to do is read, laugh and eat a lot of chocolate.
I wouldn’t mind going on a date with one of my best friends. Those few with whom I am free. With whom I can talk about anything without fear of being judged. One who will give me all the time to speak, seldom offering solutions, but definitely listening to me speak; about my hopes, fears, dreams, mistakes, projects, family, love and life. With whom I have travelled with before, with whom I have cried.
Maybe Kosgei, because he too has walked a greater part of this journey with me. He has been there when I was extremely sick and couldn’t get out of bed. He has been there to give me hope when everything was falling apart. He has read every piece I have written, and edited each of them. He has directed writers to me, because he believes in them as much as he believes in me. He has called me when he thought I was breaking down, and didn’t stop at nothing till I was back on my feet.
Sometimes, I think he is the one friend that never judges me. Not even my choices. And definitely not my mistakes. And of course, he claps every time I win. Genuine claps so to say.
Anyway, apart from my boyfriend and Kosgei, I would definitely love to go on a date with someone who is deep. Someone who knows the beauty that lies in silent conversations. Someone who tears up at the scent of raindrops hitting a parched earth. Someone who is thrilled by the soft touch of petals. Someone who wouldn’t mind drinking straight from the bottle. Someone who whistles at the wind, and leaves behind a pounding heart whenever they walk by.
And of course, someone who listens more than speaks, because the only reason I would go on a date is to talk to someone. And I would really love it if they listened. I would love if they found solace in watching the sun set, or in the various forms the moon takes as the days go by. Or the spark in the stars. Someone who laughs when they feel the need to. Someone who connects with their laughter on a deeper level. Someone who is not afraid of tears; one who lets them flow as easily as they should. One who doesn’t keep the things that are bothering them to themselves.
Also, someone with a deep connection with books is definitely a plus. Or the relief that comes with writing your heart out. Someone who would spend the entire day in bed reading an interesting book, not because there are deadlines attached to it, but because it gives them a glimpse of what the world is. Someone who understands there is nothing better than the world of books, and would definitely understand when I go on and on about the books I like, and the library I so want to have in my house.
I would love my date to be filled with honesty, tears, holding of hands, staring into the eyes, comfortable silence, slow music, stars, the setting sun, books, laughter and wholesomeness.
And no, I wouldn’t go on a date with a woman. I am one, and I wouldn’t want a double me if asked.
Let’s go on a date. Shall we?
See you tomorrow!